Well I'm back in Northern India. This time on my own and in a different location than I was three weeks ago. My purpose this trip is to scout out ministry locations and to develop new contacts for future world race teams. Basically, I'm trying to break open new ground up here so we can get some world race teams plugged in.
Now, if you are asking what about the rest of my squad back in Delhi - who's watching over them? That's a great question AND it gives me a chance to tell you about my new role on the world race. Right now the squad is under the leadership of Patrice Deaton. She's been one of my top team leaders and she's a rock star - so the squad is in good hands. Now with Patrice at the wheel, I'm getting a chance to make a couple scouting trips this month. Of course I'm on one right now and then next week I'll be in Nepal for a few days. The cool thing is this new role is allowing me to make an impact on the whole world race program and not just my team. So it's a good thing:)
OK, so here's the part I'm most excited about! I'm going to get a chance to work with other world race teams out in the field. Here in a couple weeks I'll help debrief the July team in Thailand. Then, next month I'll have an opportunity to help launch the October team in The Philippines. Folks, this is my passion - encouraging and pouring into other people who are walking this crazy journey called the World Race. And this is also how a lot of my role will look next year. The deal is this, God has called my to prepare HIS people for works of service in order to build up the body of Christ. And He's called me to do that through the World Race. It's a role I can pretty much fulfill in the states. (So don't worry mom!) Obviously there will be times I will do some traveling next year, but for the most part I'll be in America. Right now I don't have all the details lined out, but I wanted ya'll to know this was on my heart. Bottom line is I will need to continue to raise support so I can do this deal fulltime. So I'll be asking all my supporters to pray about that as well.
Alright moving on, let me tell you about this awesome place I'm staying. The town is called Shilma and it's located about 7200 feet up in the Himalayan Mountian Range - not far from the Tibetan border. Now, not only am I finding out about some great ministry opportunities up here, but I'm also getting a chance to check out some beautiful country. Have a look!
"For we know that our old self was crucified with Him so that the body of sin might be done away with, that we should no longer be slaves to sin..."
– Romans 6:6
"Those who belong to Christ Jesus have crucified the sinful nature with its passions and desires."
– Galatians 5:24
Just to give ya'll a heads up – this blog is raw, raging and real. Leave your expectations of what a "Christian missionary" should say or feel at the door.
The bottom line is this my friends – dying ain't pretty.
In my head I get that my "old self" was crucified with Christ. I get that I've been raised to new life with Him as well. And I realize that's a one-time deal. I don't have to keep going back and killing the old Rusty. That dude is dead.
However, the "sinful nature" is something else. The sinful nature is the flesh and as long as we live on this earth we will always battle the flesh's desires and passions.
That's what we must die to – the "desires and passions" of our sinful nature.
This is a very messy process for me.
Back in the day, the passions and desires of my sinful nature were very easy to spot – drinking, partying, drugs and all kinds of other junk. Today though, they are much harder to find. I've learned on this trip that I am extremely prideful, controlling and judgmental. But it goes a hell of a lot deeper. It goes all the way back to the Garden when Adam and Eve chose to eat from the tree of knowledge of good and evil.
Let me give you a quick back-story.
You see, the serpent promised Adam and Eve that if they ate from that tree they would become like God – that they would be able to determine for THEMSELVES what was good or evil. So in essence by eating the fruit Adam and Eve were saying, "In the future we will make decisions based on OUR knowledge of good and evil. We don't need you God." They chose the path of independence. This way leads to death.
But there was another tree in the middle of that garden – The Tree of Life. This tree represents Jesus. This tree is the path of dependence on God. This tree provides eternal life.
It's a simple choice.
Tree of knowledge of good and evil = independence = DEATH
OR
Tree of Life = dependence = LIFE
Lately folks, I've been choosing death.
I've been choosing to decide for MYSELF what is good and right for my life. I've been choosing independence.
This trip has brought me to the end of my strength. I can't save myself from this freakin' hell that I live in each day. I can't tell you how sick I am of bumpy rickshaw rides, jerk rickshaw drivers that want more money ONLY BECAUSE I'm WHITE, inconsistent electricity, sleeping on a thermarest with so much deep skin on it that it feels like I'm in bed with someday. I'm sick of the fact NO ONE has change. If you try to pay for something in a big bill these folks can't break it. It's like that all over the world. I'm sick of the inconsistency of EVERYTHING. Oh yeah, I'm also sick of this country not having any beef in it.
I WANT COMFORT! AND I WANT IT NOW! I'M DONE WITH THIS S---! PERIOD
It's nuts what crucifying the desires of our sinful nature will do to a man. It's turned me into something that's not very pretty. I am learning REAL fast that I can't wake up early for Jesus unless I have a hot cup of coffee and a chair waiting on me. We have no chairs or coffee here. So instead I just sleep in. I've learned that my language turns EXTREMELY foul when I can't satisfy the desires of my flesh.
I've watched my faith waver as my comfort level has dropped. My hope for the future God has for me looks a lot LESS appealing with each passing day of this "third world living" crap. I'm fearful that serving God means living like this – in this hot, hell house forever and ever and ever. And now I'm at the point of, "screw this whole path of dependence crap! Let me find a new way!"
So here's a typical look at MY path – it's a path of comfort, security, no risk and stability. I think, "Maybe I'll go home and get back in TV – make good money and live a quiet, easy life somewhere."
What's wrong with that huh? – I'm living a good, respectable life. So what's problem? That's not the life God has called me to. See, that's MY path, MY plan – not HIS! And By choosing this path I'm choosing the way of independence - which as I said before leads to death.
"To prepare God's people for works of service, so that the body of Christ may be built up..."
– Ephesians 4:12
I was in Manila last September when God placed this call on my life.
This is HIS path for my life – HIS plan. This is a path that requires my total dependence on HIM.
Problem is, all this crap I'm going thru here has clouded that call. It's caused me to seriously ask is this really the way I want to go. After all, I am throwing a baby, hissy fit right here in India. My flesh is dying and it's close to taking my HOPE with it.
Here's what weird though, in a strange way – I love this stuff. I know I'm crucifying that f-ing, fit throwing little boy inside me. I'm killing the boy that always got his way. And in his place a man is being brought forward - a man that depends ONLY on God. This man won't be swayed by the desires of his flesh. He will not be tossed to and fro like a wave in the sea. He will walk in freedom. But folks, freedom ALWAYS comes with a price – and that price is suffering. Suffering brings freedom. Christ suffered at the hands of sinful men so that HE could win freedom over death. I suffered through hell so that I could win freedom over alcohol and drugs.
And right now I'm suffering through the loss of my pride, control and judgments so that I can walk freely into the man God has called me to be.
A few days back my sister Tracy and I were talking about routines and how we get so wrapped up in our daily doings that if anything happens to upset that routine then we just go nuts. This was definitely the case in my life. You folks out there that know me know that I am a creature of habit. I mean come on, I ate salmon and rice nearly everyday for lunch for 4 years. I'm just the kind of guy that if I find something that works I stick with it. Here's a look at my life from May '03 til April '07.
9A - Wake up and eat breakfast
9:45 - Hit the gym
10:50 - Head home in time to watch "Young and the Restless." Go ahead and laugh! I got hooked back in the summer of '87 right before 6th grade. I never missed it. I taped it in junior high and highschool and I planned my college classes around it.
11:25 - start preparing my tasty fish and rice.
11:50 - eat lunch
Noon - shower and get ready for work
12:45 - Head to work. Now even though I worked as a TV sports anchor work was still for the most part very routine.
1:30 - 6P - Depending on where I was at in my television career, this time was usually filled with getting video and interviews, then some editing and prepping for the 5 and 6.
6:35 - Out the door for dinner with my work buddies.
8 - 10:30 - Put together my stuff for the 10 and then head home.
11:00 - 1A - Get home, shower, eat scoops of peanut butter for a snack and usually watch a movie or some TV and then to bed.
And so it went for 4 YEARS!
Here is just a little bit of what I wrote in my journal during that time.
I'm so bored. My life is so empty, it's stale, very, very stale. My life is lifeless, uneventful and not fulfilled. There's so much that needs to be done is this world. God give me the strength. I need more, not just strength, but more love, more willingness to help, give, teach, inspire, lead. This world is wrapping up! God get me in the good fight! I'm sick of the routine! I'm sick of the normal, it's killing me. Break the chains God!"
Here's the crazy thing, it took me three years to get to this point, but before that I would do ANYTHING to protect my routine. You see folks, for me, having a set routine was my way to CONTROL the environment around me. And I've since learned my control issues come from my lack of trust in God. It was my routine that gave me comfort, security, protection and peace. But I only received those things if my routine went as planned. Any disruption whatsoever caused me to flip out, thus losing my sense of peace, comfort, safety and security. I would do whatever it took to protect it - I was a slave to the routine. It was my god, my master.
"Then you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free." - John 8:32
One of the big reasons I came on the world race was to have control stripped from me and my routine smashed. HA! That is definitely happening everyday. Let me tell ya, living in third world countries has taught me this - BE FLUID, NOT JUST FLEXIBLE, BECAUSE FLEXIBLE PEOPLE STILL BREAK. Folks, NOTHING is consistent in third world countries! No one is EVER on time! You go to a restaurant and it NEVER fails they're out of whatever it is you wanted! The 20 plus people you live with always keep things different. It is nearly impossible to find any routine. Which is what I asked for! Now I have to find my comfort, peace and security elsewhere. I'm forced to go to God for those things, because ain't no way you can get into a routine out here.
So as I watch my sister wake up to the slavery of her routine I'm encouraged because I know it's only God that can give her this revelation.
Tracy, rejoice, because the Lord is speaking to you! Now as to what's next? I have no clue. Not everyone needs to be fired or quit their job and join the world race. There is another way. And that only way is thru Jesus. Tracy, you're new life is hidden in Christ. So the only way to take hold of that new life is to pursue Jesus. How does that look for you? You got to figure that out sweetie. But a great place to start is in the Word. Take some time to pray and ask God to reveal more to you. He will - in HIS time!
I love you and I'm praying for you always! Oh by the way, 100 days to go so I'll see you soon:)
Here are some photos from this past weekend. Me, three of my leaders, Jake (former WRer), and Michael and Kathy (our squad coaches) went up to northern India for a pastor's conference.
Gretchen, Patrice, me and Jake at the foothills of the Himalayan Mountains. The place we were at in northern India was about 100 miles south of Tibet and a 175 miles west of Nepal.
Kim, me and Michael, to the far right, having some fun during worship.
Preaching the love of Jesus
Indians love getting their picture taken with Americans:) This picture and the next couple were taken in Dehli.
Yes that's a REAL COBRA!
This is me standing in front of some Indian war memorial.
Alright, so let me just update ya'll real quick on what our ministry looks like this month in India. First off, we are all back together as a squad again. So that allows us to minister to a wide variety of people. We've got folks working with orphans, lepers and refugees from Burma. There is also the possibility of getting a chance to work with Indian college students.
So far the heat has not been that bad. We're in the middle of monsoon season right now so we do have lots of cloud cover and the rain really cools things down. To be honest, it's a lot like being in Arkansas in August with temperatures close to 100 with all kinds of humidity.
Please continue to pray for us when the spirit prompts you.
Ericka here - posting this for Rusty, since it's around 2am in India and he and the squad don't have internet access. (The time difference is 9 and 1/2 hours ahead of Eastern Time, if you're wondering.)
We just wanted to let you all know that (after a few delays) the first half of the squad made it safely to India tonight. That would be:
Rusty, Magen, Caroline, Patrice, Meredith, Nate, Sarah, Jen, Kim, Kelton, Gretchen, Teagan and Laura.
I just got off the phone with my good friend in India (who's our American contact there) who had the team with him. Half were already at the house for the night - the other half were in the car with him, about 15 minutes away from 'home'. We've checked and double-checked - everyone is accounted for and will be locked - safe and sound- into the house for the night soon. I know they all need a good nights sleep after their day of travel.
The rest of the squad will leave from South Africa later today. That group is:
Mark, Robby, Steve, Eli, Matt Peters, Matt Snyder, Angie, Ruby, Andi, Michelle, Becky and Tammy.
Just wanted to update you all! Please continue to pray for safe and stress-free travel (for the 2nd travel group). For the whole squad - please start covering their time in India in prayer! Pray for protection, strength, rest, good health, and for God to be at work in them and through them in powerful ways!
Two nights ago my squad and I were robbed at gunpoint in the
hostel we were staying at in Johannesburg, South
Africa. First and foremost nobody got hurt!
Praise God we are all alive and safe! However, we got tons of stuff jacked from
us. So here is the email I just sent out to the parents of my team.
Dear World Race parents,
First off I want to apologize to ya'll for just now getting in touch with you. The last couple days have been hectic and stressful to say the least. And my TOP priority has been getting the squad moved out of the hostel and into a location where the folks can feel safe. Not to mention, some of us have been scrambling to get new passports and visas for our upcoming trip to India. So thank you very much for your patience in all this. I can't even imagine the worry ya'll must have been going thru and are still going through.
I'm sure you have heard all sorts of things about what happened two nights ago, so let me just give you the facts. Tuesday afternoon the whole squad, minus Patrice's team, (Patrice, Nate, Angie, Andi and Jen) arrived at The Brown Sugar Hostel in Johannesburg.
I realize it's got a funny name, but the hostel is not in a bad part of Jo'Burg plus we have stayed there three different times while in Africa. So I felt safe about bringing the team here. Anyway, around 8p that evening probably four, maybe five men came into the hostel armed with pistols and told everyone to get on their face in the lounge area. That's where about 12 of us were and the rest of the squad was being held in their dorm room.
Guns were pointed at people, threats were made, but NO ONE was physically harmed. Praise the Lord! However, LOTS of our stuff was taken: cash, cameras, computers, passports, phones, clothes, IPOD's, etc. I'd say the whole thing lasted about 20 minutes. As soon as it was over, the first thing we did was to make sure everyone was OK. Then we started taking an inventory of what was taken, I called AIM, and then people began calling and canceling cards. So anyway, things are just now settling down.
Just so you know, I got the squad at a missionary base an hour away from Jo'Burg. Luckily, when we get to India our team coaches Michael and Kathy Hindes will be there to help us process thru everything. Believe me, we are taking this matter seriously and we do understand the need for counseling at this time.
Now speaking of India, those that needed new passports got them and the whole squad has its visas. So, we will fly out in two groups this weekend: Me, Magen, Caroline, Patrice, Meredith, Nate, Sarah, Jen, Kim, Kelton, Gretchen, Teagan and Laura will leave Friday and Mark, Robby, Steve, Eli, Matt Peters, Matt Snyder, Angie, Ruby, Andi, Michelle, Becky and Tammy will fly out Saturday.
Again thank you for your patience. I love each one of your kids so much and their safety and well-being is my main concern. So if ya'll have any questions please email me or our team coach Michael. His email is Michael@ccchurches.com.
Here's a list of my personal losses:
1. Laptop computer
2. Bible
3. Journal
4. IPOD
5. Two cell phones
6. Passport
7. Credit card and two bank cards
8. 100 USD cash
Plus some other small items that were in my small backpack.
"What is more, I consider everything a loss compared to surpassing greatness of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord, for whose sake I have lost all things. I consider them rubbish, that I may gain Christ"
- Philippians 3:8
Glory be to Christ Jesus, the name above ALL names!
I don't really know any better way to put it. I'm SUPER dry spiritually. It's day 200 of THIS race, but for me, since i did nearly half this trip last year, I've been out of the country for a solid year. I miss my family. I miss my friends. I'm about flat out done. Now yes, I can continue to do the basic things that keep this squad getting from one place to another. However, on the spiritual side of it - I'm useless.
I can't tell you how hard it is not to look to end of this trip. To be honest, I'm in love - the problem is, she is back in the states. But, Ericka is supportive of where I'm at right now. And we both agree the Lord has more to teach us while we are separated. Thing is though, that's only part of it. Bottom line - I'm getting to a point in my walk with Christ where I just have to flat out chose to keep going. For so long I was going with "the feeling." I was walking the walk because it was fun, exciting and new. Well it just ain't new anymore. It's everyday life. HA! There is a lesson right there! At some point, everything we do turns into everyday life. Whether that be being a husband, father or globe-trotting missionary. And I guess what I'm learning is that at some point all those things I look to to make me happy will lose their luster and become "everyday life." So the question is now, what will I do? Chose to continue to walk in where God has placed me, or run to the next best thing? I've run to the "next best thing" my whole life.
Either way, for a while now my pride has kept me from openly admitting these things. Well - to hell with my pride!
This Friday we leave for India. It's supposed to be 110 degrees and humid as all get out. Please pray for more of HIS strength in my life. I need it - I'm out of mine.
Alright, so first off I want to give a HUGE thanks to God and to my supporters! WOW! That’s all I can say. Thanks to you guys, nearly my entire support need has been met. The Lord brought in the immediate need of $4600 plus about two grand more. Basically all I have left to raise is about $2000. So I thank you and I know my team thanks you as well.
I want to update you folks on what I got going on this month. Right now I’m in Swaziland working at some Adventure in Mission care points. During the next four weeks we are going to build covered cooking sites at three of the care points. You see, the GoGo’s (the name of the ladies that take care of the kids) cook the kid’s food outside over an open fire. So, if it’s raining or the wind is bad that day obviously it’s harder to cook. We’re going to make it easier on them by constructing a three-meter by two and a half meter concrete building that will protect the cooking process from the outside elements. A lot of these kids walk great distances to eat the only meal they will get that day. So it’s obviously important we get this done.
I’ll be in Swaziland until July 20th. Then we will head over to Johannesburg and come July 26th we’ll be on our way to India. It’s so hard to believe our time in Africa is nearly over.
Be blessed ya’ll. And again thank you so much for all your support.
Well folks after a quick trip to Cincinnati to bring to my teammate Rachel Hunt home for her father's funeral I'm back in Johannesburg, South Africa. Please continue to keep Rachel and her family in ya'lls prayers. I know they are very appreciative of all the support they have received from AIM and all the January 08 racers.
Also I want to say thank you to my great friend from last year's world race - Josh Daniels. He lives in Cincinnati and on short notice he took me in his home and treated me like a king for two days. We ate steak, steak and more beef. I got a chance to meet his family and dominate in Nintendo Wii bowling:)
Brother, it was great seeing you again. Thank you so much for your love and hospitality. You were truly Jesus to me this past weekend.
"For this reason I remind you to fan into flame the gift of God, which is in you through the laying on of my hands."
